5 weeks. That is all I have left here before I become a foreigner in a land where my forefathers come from.
I am still not very prepared. My mind and my heart basically refuse to get into the relocation mode the last few days. I have so many things which I cannot seem to put down (direct Chinese translation). I am still in the thick of managing work, worrying over things which I have no control over, and being devious in getting some people into trouble.
If not for being "forced" to let go, I seriously won't be able to. And God knows me well enough to force it upon me very gently.
It was Hari K yesterday. And I met up with many former students. Many of them came running to me screaming "Puan Chrisssssssssss". And we talked and talked and just enjoyed the sharing of our lives. Yes, it was a sharing of our lives - how they were doing, where I will be going and what I'll do. And I realised, I miss those kids who have now turned into adults. I will miss being part of the lives of my students, especially those who have been close to me.
Someone said to me today that "our students contribute a lot to make us do the best we can". I was once his student. I felt honoured that he said that to me, and I can pretty much say the same about my own students.
It's hard, this business of letting go. But do it, I must. And I know, much as I want them to miss me, I would rather that they move on quickly and do the best they can in all they do, and make me proud - as I watch from afar.
If I have the time, I will be posting individual letters to some people in this blog, before I leave.