In less than 4 days really, the year 2012 will be upon us. As usual, I am not one for resolutions much. I just aspire to be better. No specifics. No point having those specifics when I know I will eventually disregard them.
2012 is going to be another challenging year. Many changes in my life are in the works. I am not sure I am prepared for all the changes. All I know is that, ready or not, I will come to the bridge and I will have to cross it.
In the work front, I have lost the best ever panel head to work for and work with. We were not just colleagues, but we were genuinely friends, partners in crime and also a sister to the other, the sister neither of us ever had. Much as I mourn losing her in the workplace, she is not lost to me as we are still friends and will continue to be buddies. But it will be tough working without her.
In a sense, because she has left, a domino effect will be seen in the workplace. I will walk in her shoes sometimes. Big shoes those. I have more responsibilities in any area that she used to work in. And people assume that, because I am with her often, I know what she does / has done, and therefore, can just fill in the blanks ... the void she has left. I already know some of the things I will end up doing. Not happy but .... work is work. And I will treat it as such - work.
In the home front - Joel is going to school soon. He will join his brothers in primary school. I am worried and nervous for him. I don't know if he will manage. I hope he does. I hope he will not be overly affected by the difference between kindy and primary school.
On top of that, another big change seems to be in the offing. Not sure if it will work out. If it does, I will have extra headaches. One person's decision and change affects the rest of us. I'm just waiting to see how things work out. Taking it one day at a time. If I think too much, I may go crazy with worry.
Am I looking forward to 2012? I am not sure. Perhaps I am. But like everything in life, it is the fear of the unknown that seems to spoil it for me.
So I will walk with my head up high tomorrow when I attend the first staff meeting. I will do my very best because I know it's what I'm supposed to do. But I will have to prepare. Prepare for the possibilities in the future. Bring it on, 2012!