Saturday, June 18, 2011


I am seriously tired. Physically tired as well as mentally and occasionally emotionally tired. Most of the tiredness is due to work, well, not the usual WORK work, but just all the things that need to be done.
For most of the week, starting from after my Chiang Mai trip, it was playing catch up with marking exam papers. Many wondered why I didn't try to finish marking before the trip. Well the answer is simple : I was too busy recovering from the tiredness from the period of preparing exam papers to all sorts of other WORK, and having D*starz compete in the NYD competition in Putrajaya (which we didn't win or get any prizes), then making sure they are okay for the cheer camp they eventually attended, and trying to spend time with my own children. All at the same time I was trying to complete marking my Literature paper.
It was tiring and the trip was something I wanted very much, just so I could GET AWAY from everything : work, responsibilities, and yes, even kids. Just for a few days. I know I sound like a terrible mother, but I needed the trip to get back the ME I seem to be losing. And once I came back, it was almost non-stop work, trying to complete the marking of papers in the fairest of manner. Some people mark really fast. I don't, well, not as fast anymore. I get tired easily. My eyes get watery really fast. And I try not to rush through the marking process so that I am fair to my students. Of course, my children who were on holiday also demanded my attention. How was I to neglect them when I neglect them enough during the school semester itself?
So school has started for a week and I scrambled like a mad woman trying to do everything and complete everything FAST! It didn't help that I now have to work out paper work for Cheer Club / the cheer teams and manage their finances now that cheer season is here.
Tshirts, CHARM membership forms, C3 forms, C3 fees, coaching fees owing, uniform money, claims, transportation issues, being with the girls during practices and competitions .... the list goes on. I have just come back from the SOX competition. I am disappointed that the junior team did not get a better placing. I can only see us ahead of the two new teams from the south. I thought we did better. But then, what do I know? I chose not to know. On one hand I was annoyed the coach did not help to prepare them for this competition. I know he wanted to focus on another competition, but they needed something of a smaller scale as a preparation for bigger competitions. If he had helped with a few things, I know the girls would have had a better placing. (Kayna, if you are reading this, I do not want you to repeat it to you-know-who) Well, it is too late to regret or be upset, so we just have to move on and look forward to the next competitions.
There is so much more of work ... WORK that is coming my way. So much of it is actually paper WORK and I am not looking forward to any of the paper WORK! Least of all is the one that is absolutely unnecessary but some people just want it done.
I am tired. Yes .... and I feel guilty. Because I often place WORK above my family. Not good. Not by choice most of the time but ... it happens.
I am tired. I shall try to rest now.

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